My Child Has School Anxiety: What Support Can I Ask the School For?

Many parents are unaware that schools have a legal duty to make reasonable adjustments for disabled pupils, including many children experiencing anxiety, school avoidance, autism, ADHD, sensory differences and other neurodivergent needs.

Reasonable adjustments are not about giving a young person an advantage.

They are about removing barriers that make it harder for them to access education on the same basis as their peers.

The purpose of reasonable adjustments is to help a child feel safe enough, regulated enough and supported enough to engage with learning.

Every child is different, which means adjustments should be tailored to the individual rather than applied as a one-size-fits-all solution.

Below are examples of adjustments families may wish to discuss with their child's school.

Communication & Relationships

• A named member of staff as the main point of contact for both the family and young person

• Consistent communication between home and school

• Positive communication, not just contact when difficulties arise

• Regular check-ins with a trusted adult (e.g. Head of Year, Form Tutor or Pastoral Lead)

• Support to repair relationships following periods of absence

• Opportunities for the young person to share their views in a way that feels comfortable

• Advance notice of significant changes to routines, staffing or timetables

Sensory Environment

• Access to a quiet space when overwhelmed

• Permission to leave class a few minutes early to avoid crowded corridors

• Access to noise-cancelling headphones where appropriate

• Seating away from high-traffic or noisy areas

• Alternative lunch or break arrangements if the environment is overwhelming

• Access to sensory tools where appropriate

• Reduced exposure to particularly challenging environments where possible

Emotional Regulation & Wellbeing

• A named trusted adult for regular check-ins

• Access to a safe space during periods of overwhelm

• A discreet signal in class to indicate when support is needed

• Reduced pressure when dysregulated

• Opportunities for movement and regulation breaks throughout the day

• Emotional regulation support rather than immediate sanctions

• Staff awareness of anxiety triggers and warning signs

• Support following periods of distress or dysregulation

Learning & Executive Functioning

• Clear, concise instructions

• Written instructions alongside verbal instructions

• Tasks broken into smaller chunks

• Reduced cognitive load where appropriate

• Support with organisation and planning

• Regular reminders and check-ins

• Visual timetables or visual supports

• Support to prioritise tasks

• Additional processing time

• Flexible deadlines where appropriate

Participation in Lessons

• Avoid cold calling or putting the student on the spot unexpectedly

• Provide opportunities to contribute voluntarily

• Give advance notice if participation or verbal responses will be required

• Allow thinking and processing time before responding

• Offer alternative ways to contribute, such as written responses or discussions with a trusted adult

• Allow presentations to be recorded rather than delivered live where appropriate

Homework & Coursework

• Reduced homework expectations during periods of high anxiety

• Flexibility around deadlines

• Prioritisation of essential work

• Access to support with organisation and task planning

• Alternative methods of completing work where appropriate

• Clear communication around expectations

Attendance & School Anxiety

• Flexible start arrangements if mornings are particularly difficult

• A planned arrival routine

• A safe base on arrival

• Reduced demands during periods of heightened anxiety

• Agreed strategies for managing overwhelm without immediately escalating attendance expectations

• Gradual reintegration plans where appropriate

• Part-time or reduced timetables where appropriate and regularly reviewed

• Alternative entrances to reduce anxiety around arrival

• Permission to attend specific lessons initially

• Support during key transition points throughout the day

Social Anxiety & Peer Relationships

• Support during unstructured times such as lunch and break

• Access to quieter social spaces

• Support with friendship difficulties where appropriate

• Safe peer connections

• Staff awareness of social anxiety challenges

• Reduced pressure to participate in large group activities

Exams & Assessments

• Rest breaks

• Extra time where appropriate

• Alternative rooms for assessments

• Reduced sensory distractions

• Support with exam planning and preparation

• Consideration of anxiety-related difficulties during assessment periods

Questions to Ask the School

When schools agree to adjustments, it's important to understand exactly how they will be implemented.

Consider asking:

• What reasonable adjustments can be put in place immediately?

• Which adjustments can be implemented without additional evidence?

• Who is responsible for implementing each adjustment?

• How will staff be informed of the agreed plan?

• How will the school monitor whether adjustments are being followed?

• What happens if an adjustment is not implemented?

• How often will the plan be reviewed?

• Who will be the main point of contact for communication with home?

• How will my child know what support is available to them?

• How will success be measured?

• What additional support is available if these adjustments are not enough?

A Final Thought

Many parents spend months trying to help their child fit into a system that currently feels overwhelming.

Sometimes the conversation needs to shift.

Rather than asking:

"What does my child need to do differently?"

It can be helpful to ask:

"What barriers might be getting in the way, and what support would help remove them?"

When schools and families work together to understand the needs beneath the behaviour, young people are often far more able to engage, learn and thrive.